Luck That Didn't Last
By Chris Davies
'Addicted to love' was a huge hit for Robert Palmer. Addictions always begin with huge hits, often leading to huge lows and even bigger debts. Chris Davies, a Charity Funding Manager, has had his fair share of highs and lows.
I guess people can get addicted to lots of different stuff: alcohol, drugs, gambling to name but a few. Mine started off on a really small scale. A bit of fun, a quick buzz, call it what you like.
I began visiting the bookies at lunchtimes with a couple of friends from work. Fridays mostly. We were just warming up for the weekend. Anything to get us into that Friday feeling. A fiver here or there, maybe ten or even twenty pounds if I was feeling lucky. Strangely enough I won more than I lost. In fact I won quite a lot in those early days. I guess that’s how I got the bug. I often wonder how things might have turned out if I had lost more in the first few months.
Soon it all began to get very serious. My gambling had gone from a bit of Friday fun to a couple of lunchtimes a week and all day Saturday staring at multiple television screens of horses, dogs and football results in the local bookmakers. I would spend hours studying the form and convince myself that I was an expert. I was surrounded by a bunch of people, desperate for the next cheap thrill, a quick buzz, anything to fill the void within. I knew I didn’t belong there but it didn’t seem to matter. I was hooked on the adrenalin rush. Win or lose, I didn’t care. All that concerned me was the next bet, the next ‘good thing’, the next tip from the guy standing beside me.
Things had now begun to spiral downwards. Literally hundreds of losing bets later, I was gambling to try and win back my losses, desperate to get back on an even keel. Soon I found myself thousands of pounds in debt on bank overdrafts and credit cards. Life had become a never ending mix of torn up betting slips, tattered racing guides and my own made up betting schemes of how I would win back all my losses and turn thousands of pounds worth of debt into a healthy profit.
I was going down fast - emotionally, mentally and physically. First thing in the morning and last thing at night, all I could think about was the next bet. My money was running out. My bank facility and credit cards were all maxed out. I had reached an all time low with nowhere to turn except the desperate hope that my next horse would come good.
Call it fate, coincidence or divine intervention but around that time I had become friends with a couple of Christians who had not only shared their faith with me but had also been a real support to me when I most needed it. They invited me to church and I guess out of pure desperation more than anything else, I agreed to go along. I didn’t experience any flashing lights that day but I do remember having a strange sense of peace during the service, something I had not felt for years. It was over the next few months and with a lot help from the people at church that I made a lot of life changing decisions. I decided that I couldn’t carry on gambling and I decided that if there was a God that I had to get to know Him. That next year was hard but one of the best of my life. I gradually stopped betting and made a decision to be a Christian. Since then my life has turned around, I have paid off all my debts and from now on, it’s onwards and upwards.
The whole experience has taught me two lessons. Firstly, the hardest decisions in life are often the best ones. And secondly, and the more importantly, allowing God into my life is the best thing I have ever done.
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Chris Davies is the Fund-raising manager at the Megacentre, Sheffield. He has a shy wife called Louise, is a little over 40 and will become a daddy in 2007.